Rental, mental.

Time: 11:06pm

Date: 31 March, 2010.

Location: How!5, Clayton.

Like.. wow. I remembered to pay my rental. eheheheh...

and yea, the verdict's out. I AM in over my head. time to get my priorities straight. seem to be marching back to the road taken though I did take another way that unforsakenly detoured me back to that route.

But the thing is.. I love the thrill. the constant pressure... for now maybe. I mayb whine... but it felt like second nature to do what I do. All I wanna be is a super woman but really, I'm just a gal, wanting to be a super woman.

LoL, too much to chew? but it's irresistably hard not to bite!!!

need to change modes. Mode 2 - micro-managing time I think. heard that helps for some people.

Unlike some lad who keep telling me that his life's awesomely awesome (whatever that means) and that time is made... My time is of essense... and wasting it on Family Guy is just, well, wasteful.

Anyways, I went and ask Kellie, how they managed to juggle everything, she said, we don't sleep. I'm not gona be THAT extreme but i'll try to tune my biological clock to muiss clock. lol.

Paddle!!!

Time: 12:48am
Date: 29 March, 2010.
Location: How!5, Clayton.

in over my head or a beautiful wave to catch?

It's a matter of sinking or swimming... guess we'll find out!

** special thanks to my awesome neighbour who lent me his precious camera for the trip so that I can take awesome pics for my other friends to see and drool all over their keyboards... **

Skippppy in Grampy!

Time: 10:41am
Date: 23 March 2010
Location: Computer Lab, Campus Centre, Clayton.

hmm, updates.

The Carnage was totally AWESOME! maybe my body just couldn't sustain the constant sleep deprivation and forced me to sleep a whole lot in the Grampians. Sarah and Audrey were totally awesome bunk buddies... went rock climbing.. bush walking in Mount Hollow and Mount Zero. Though jia yeng, pei chin, leng seng and I did go to Gramps in January but it was an entirely different experience, I met many friendly nature-loving people there... and REALLY hardcore thrill seekers man... Got some bruises as souviners as usual, accident prone me... We stayed in Old Smith Road campsite last time but stayed in Stapylton Campsite this time. We were woken up by kangaroos in the middle of the night!! how COOL was THAT?!

anyways, yea, I gave a shot again, final shot actually in trying to get into MUISS and it paid off. Today's the first AGM, i think. we'll wait and see how it goes... hope I can learn something out of the experience =)

Anyhoo, I read this email this friend sent about the 'malay origins'... was *wow* to say the least. SO, orang Melayu are people who ranaway? don't really know how true is it but... according to JS Mill's On Liberty, Freedom of Speech is a fundamental human right. hence, I turned to my nexe very reliable source.. wiki.

Read this...

One Straits Chinese leader asked, "Who said this is a Malay country? ... When Captain [Francis] Light arrived, did he find Malays, or Malay villages? Our forefathers came here and worked hard as coolies — weren't ashamed to become coolies — and they didn't send their money back to China. They married and spent their money here, and in this way the Government was able to open up the country from jungle to civilization. We've become inseparable from this country. It's ours, our country..." Malay intellectuals objected to this reasoning, claiming that such reasoning is totally absurd and proposing an analogy with the Chinese as masons and Malaya as a house.

replace the word Chinese with immigrants, and the word Malay with slightly earlier immigrants, it could be anywhere in the world. It's like the same tune over and over again... What do people actually learn from history?

Gramps... the sequel!!!

Time: 4:03pm.
Date: 18 March, 2010.
Location: How!5, Clayton.

OMGGGGGGG, so excited about the Carnage thing!!! lol.. I just wanna go to the top of the hill and SCREEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM... hahaha. sounds fun eh?

hmmm, what's on next week. Presentation on the Week 4 thingy on thurs' tute, M.Club gig on Thurs 4:30 - 11:30pm, Mitch, Rashaam's house warming =) feels like I'm getting a keg for the first time... lol.

*edited 6:42pm*

dont think i'll make the cut. lol~ too much lipid to cut. ishhhh...

Just a thought.

Time: 10:17am
Date: 16 March 2010
Location: How!5, Clayton.

Though I don't hate it, feels like BBC's style of reporting's gearing towards sensationalization. Certain graphics or dramatic effects are welcome but really couldn't imagine BBC's way of reporting becoming as distasteful as ACA (A Current Affair's)...

anyways, spontaneous floor outing to Sofia's yday night made me realize... I LURVE THE MARS BAR cake in Sofia's~ ok, it is insanely rich and virtually impossible to down it in one serving, or 2 for that matter... but... it's just THAT good... omg omg omg... *salivating*

* This pic will stand in for the real thing, until I stop procrastinating & start editing the pics...*

Grace's day.

Time: 11:28pm
Date: 12 March, 2010.
Location: How!5, Clayton.

today's been a icky day. screwed up a lot in post office... the people in PO didn't help either. cari pasal only!! this jewish russian... OMGGG, totally bullied us girls. luckily she met Woon and not Toan, if not there's gona be a fight... then finally had a shift in MClub with the infamous Adam but yea.. i don't agree the way he does things but he's a marshmellow with a tough choc coating. i still think u actually need to tell ur subords in order for them to understand u lor... but he's pretty sweet to walk me to get the bike to cycle home.

been working really hard lately... around 12 hours today... plus was sick. so... yup. not a good combo. think i trying to drown the endless thooughtssssss running through my head... hahahaha. farny. running nose. cough. headache. sorethroat. ouch. incoherent thoughts. really should start on assignment. stay tough woman!

p/s: happy bday graciaaaa~ i'm really sorry but am really tired tonight... just know I lurve u but I know someone else out there will love u more~ and no, not only talking about that brazillian wannabe =p

Life's a Learning Process.

Time: 1:23am
Date: 10 March 2010
Location: How!5, Clayton.

totally random. When i was doing my biz in the ladies' just now, I thought to myself.

life's an endless learning process...

like then and there, I'm still learning how to do my biz knowing there's other people in the toilet right infront of my room. I have no problem number one-ing or even number two-ing in public toilet when I don't actually know the person in the next compartment, but I do have trouble "getting it done", so to speak, in the communal toilet in my halls.

I'm still learning not that instantly dislike that female Chinese customer who comes in every now and then to get my blood boiling. I don't know why. I can sympathize young momma's boy/girl, regardless of age, sex, ethnicity. I can deal with hard-headed, difficult customers who insisted that i off the fan even though there's lack of proper ventilation in the PO on the basis that I'll blow the 'diseases' from behind the counter, around the post office. Strangely enough, there were only Laiti and I behind the counter and none of us were sick. and yes, in retrospect, she might have sounded in a little racist. Luckily Toan's not there, he'll totally give her attitude. anyways, speaking of this young chinese lady who's prolly a year or two older than me... She's difficult, but not exceptionally difficult. I don't know why she just sent out the 'hate me' vibe.

I'm learning not to let trivial stuffs get the best of me. For some reasons, that Melbourne hailstorm on saturday gave me an epiphany. Why bother myself with unimportant emotional stuff that I could nothing about. Why not actually CARE about something that I can actually control... in other words, I'm learning not to waste my time on u anymore? lol. long and complication story along the lines of self-doubt and self-loathing. I am such a blonder version of elliot reid from scrubs... in the words of Toan, Ngai Tiu! --- apparently is slow pepper in vietnamese, meaning.. slow.

I'm learning to love myself more? self-criticism is healthy to a certain extent but going overboard will only send ur self-worth and self-confidence down to the deep deep sea, in search of Heart of the Ocean, as appeared in Titanic the movie. and yea, that doesn't only involve talking tough.

I'm learning to want to achieve something so much so that it hurts? haha, sounds sadistic but really... I like so many things yet nothing. hmm.. I'm still getting hang of the philosophy class that i'm taking this sem. horrible! it's supposed to be INT ok?! it's really hard to talk stuff in bioethics/ethics' discourse... mainly coz I don't know squat about it.

and ofcoz.. I need to learn to let go.

.... maybe i really should get to sleep... i'm really mentally tired, and i doubt sleep alone can do much good though.

Internet access = human right

Time: 8:29am
Date: 9 March 2010
Location: How!5, Clayton.

Something came up in BBC that interested me today.

Is internet access is a 'human right'?

I think it's more or less related to the freedom of information and freedom of speech seeing that those are intrinsic rights for people. Yes, internet access has the potential to provide a democratic platform for a convergence of ideas but unfortunately, digital divide between nations made it slightly hard for poorer countries to catch up with the times. Countries like China and Thailand who imposed censorship on the internet... Are the people, then, denied of their rights?

all in all, is the importance of internet access be equated as human right to freedom of expression?

Wish List.

Time: 11:42pm.
Date: 3 March, 2010.
Location: How!5, Clayton.

... is it too much that I ask for a crutch for christmas?

really hate the feeling in my guts whenever the flashbacks sneak in.

it is bitter indeed.

on another note,

MARK MY WORDS, I AM GONA NAIL THIS UNIT!!!!

RWAR!!!